Home made liposuction!!

Here's a fun idea for all the aspiring young surgeons out there; Ask your mum where she keeps the grease jar that stores the hamburger fat. Then grab a nice big spoon -- preferably from mum's fine diner collection -- and dig the fat out of the jar, placing it into a plastic bag. Squeeze the air out of the bag, being careful not to squeeze out any of the fat. Then tie it off well. Finally, grab a knife and a straw. Make a small incision in the fat-bag with the knife, and insert the straw. You've now completed the operation, and may begin relieving the patient of their excessive fat. Place both lips on the opposite end of the straw and draw out as much of the fat as you possibly can. Imagine it's like a warm, bitter milk shake! When the bag is emptied of it's fatty contents, you may kick back and relax, as you wait for the healthy pay-check you rightly deserve.

Next week, we'll learn how to autopsy the local roadkill to determine the cause of death! Go get 'em doc!